Are You Denying Your Inner Most Self?

Deep inside you there is a place where you are shouting your own name, trying to get your attention. Can you hear it?

Some can some can’t. The ones that can may feel uncomfortable, because this voice is asking them to do something that will bring about some hefty changes in life.

The ones that can’t hear it have buried it so deep that it is lost, unless you know where to look.

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What does it mean to listen to your inner most self? It means living your life authentically from your heart. It means letting your soul into your body and creating balance and harmony. It means letting your light shine in the world. That all sounds great, and it really is, but there is a problem, and this is the root of why we have stopped listening.

From birth we are under pressure to conform. We have to conform to the way we are wrapped in a blanket, we have to conform to our feeding schedule, sleeping schedule, our parent’s ideas about how we are brought up (usually based on the societal norm), or learning to be on our own.

As we begin to grow we have to conform to ways of behaving, good manners, not getting our own way, eating what we are told to eat. We have to go to school, learn about laws, and learn about gender roles. We have to conform to a rigid way of teaching, sometimes to a religion, to family values.

We have parents going through their own struggles, peer pressure, we are expected to follow a pattern. Go to school, do well, get a job, do well, meet a partner, settle down, have children. Be nice to others, be loving and caring, be sociable, and be responsible…….

Is it any wonder that we struggle to know ourselves at all? Is it any wonder that the most asked question is ‘Who am I?’ closely followed by, ‘Why am I here?’

There is a soul lesson in this. It is learning how to fit into your family and community without giving up who you are. The trouble is, we have already given up who we are. We eventually get to a point in our lives, some quicker than others, where we stop and realise that we now have to re find our self.

Society is not going to change overnight. So we have to take the responsibility for ourselves to help ourselves and others to be the people we were born to be. Of course eventually this has a knock on effect on Society too. It all starts with the individual.

So let’s begin with the search. Do you hear that inner most voice, asking you to follow your heart, even when you KNOW others will disapprove, will disown you and will berate you with their own opinions? Do you ignore it? Do you explain to it why that isn’t possible? Or have you shut it out so often that it has stopped talking? Take some time now and see.

If you cannot hear your inner voice the chances are you have suffered emotional, mental and often physical abuse, or have had problems in your life that have caused such a build up of stress that you have shut down your sensitivity. In a way you are desensitised to yourself. This is such an awful state to be in, but it can be helped.

If you can hear that voice but are ignoring it, it is time to turn and face it. By ignoring this voice you are abusing yourself. You have abandoned that inner most part of you that is the essence of who you are.

If you are explaining to that voice why, what it suggests you do, is impossible, stop and think for a minute. This is exactly what a parent does to a child when they want that child to conform. The child gets angry, either fights back or sulks. Resentment grows, and often the child feels unloved because a part of who she is, is being denied. That is what you are doing. Denying yourself. If you deny yourself, how will you ever be happy?

Here is a little exercise to try, perhaps every day over a week. You will need a pen and paper, and some quiet time alone. You also need to take a deep breath and promise yourself that you will be completely honest with yourself. You will listen to your voice and write down everything that it says.

So lets begin. This is a very simple visualisation. If you don’t get actual images, don’t worry, just write down everything that comes to you, including memories and feelings.

Close your eyes and take three deep, slow, relaxing breaths. Let your worries, plans, and brain chatter go with each out breath.

Ask your inner most self to come forward so that you may meet him or her. You may see an image, or just feel this part of you come forward. Ask what you can do to re build your relationship with your innermost self. Take notes here. You may find that this part of you is cross or angry. It may be sad, confused, feeling unloved. Remember this is a part of YOU and you have abandoned it, perhaps for years. It is only right that you start to pay attention to it, start to listen to its advice and what you can do to put things right. And it is also very appropriate to, right now, this minute, start loving this part of you. You can do this by reaching out and hugging it. Or you can send heart energy, or you can, and should, say, ‘I love you’ with feeling.

This part of you has been there from birth. It knows EVERYTHING there is to know about YOU. It knows your fears, your likes and dislikes, your shadow side, your loves, your secrets. It is the closest friend you could ever have and without it you will never be complete.

By denying this part of you, you will struggle with relationships, happiness, abundance, true love, a career that fulfils you. Your perception of other people will be obscured and you will feel victimised, put upon, abused. All of these things will continue if you keep burying yourself deeper and deeper and turning your back on who you really are.

But please don’t despair, because you can never lose that innermost part of you. Yes it can be buried under the rubble of years, but it is still there, no matter how deep. It is still ready to shine, it is still ready to reveal who you are and why you are here. It will NEVER leave you. All you have to do is make a conscious effort to listen to it, to bring its voice to the surface, to allow it room to breathe and to let others see that part of you that is real.

Yes it takes some courage, yes it will bring change into your life. But this is NEEDED for your life to get on track, for you to be the wonderful glowing being that you are meant to be. It is needed for you to be successful in every area, to be happy and to be loved.

So what are you waiting for? Don’t put it off for another day. This is the most important thing you will ever do, and you are doing it all for you. If you are reading this, you are being called to get on with it. Life is waiting for you to come out and play!

Kirsten

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